Flourishing Life Classic Article Archive

Flourishing Life Society:

Beginning in 2010, I began my research on wellness. I spent several months contemplating the name for a Facebook group to post findings and motivational thoughts. By 2011, I began a web page under the same title. I moved the page to a new server a few years later, losing many of the first articles.

Over the years, my research has refocused. My early writings were more philosophical than theory backed research. Some early articles I love, others I don't. I rotate the classic selections regularly. Enjoy your wellness journey!

A Flourishing Life Article link. A Quiet Life of Desperation

A Flourishing Life Society article link. Balancing Life's Opposing Demands

Internal Link. Building Love: Love is created not found. We naturally are attracted; but from attraction we build lasting love.

Attachment Injury that Destroys Present Relationships. A Flourishing Life Society article link

FLS internal Link. Abandonment or Engulfment: Partners will inevitably face a mismatch in attachment styles. The difference doesn't matter as much as how the couple approaches and works through the difference.

Ahes of Destruction. Bountiful Blessings after Traumatic Losss

We can't force emotions to comply with our demands. We must take a subtle approach.

Internal Link: Flagship article. Ten Beacons of Light. Improving our lives isn't from following items on a simple list. Science, however, has provided some helpful clues to our pursuit of wellness. These ten beacons of light provide direction, lights that illuminate a path to growth.

Blaming the Partner. Taking Personal Responsibility for Improving Your Relationship. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Accepting life on life's own terms, frees us from the magical thinking of paradise and allows us to make the most of reality.

After the Love is Gone. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Freedom of choice is earned through mulling over possibilities, evaluating conflicting data and then determining a course of action.

A Flourishing Life Society article link. Cognitive Dissonance

Intimacy requires more than attraction. Intimacy is the crowning reward to dedicated attention to the person we love.

Internal Link: Cause of Sorrows

Flourishing Life Society Article Link. Cycle of Personal Growth.

Flourishing Life Society Link: Compassion and Flourishing

A Flourishing Life Society link. Coping with Avoidance

Intimate communication. A flourishing life Society article link

some emotions overtake are ability to react appropriately, interfering with goals.

Embracing Our Inner Child. A Flourishing Life Society article link

A Flourishing Life Society article link. Feeling Felt and validation of emotions

When we expertly greet our child's emotions with empathy, acceptance and reciprocation, the child develops a positive relationship with their own feelings--a major contribution to healthy living.

Flourishing Life Society Link. Empathy in Relationships

The present offers some fabulous gifts; but sometimes (often) we should pass and work towards a better future.

We must fight stagnation by reaching beyond comfort zone and doing something challenging.

We can change; it's just not easy. Forces pull us in many directions, usually following a set trajectory, moving in the same direction as before. We can adjust but must do so with confidence and skill.

A Flourishing Life Society article link. Fear of Failure

A flourishing Life Society article link. Emotional Overload

Limitations always are present, sneaking into our relationships, and signalling failure; but imperfection is part of the game. We must make room for the limitations.

FLS Link. Entangled relationships

A Flourishing Life Society article link. Feeling Lonely. An article on loneliness

Dependence gets a bad rap. Healthy connections are built with interdependence on each other; the security is founded in trust.

Healthy Behavior. Developing Character and Boosting Wellness. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Flourishing Life Society article link. I love you; You're Free to Leave. Loving someone includes respect; respect of their space, privacy, and freedom. Sometimes loving requires painful good-byes

I'm Okay; You're Okay. Normal Ups and Downs. A Flourishing Life Society Link

Greed and Desire. Finding Satisfaction with what we already have. A Flourishing Life Society article link

We, like the acorn, have great potential. We, unlike the acorn, are empowered beyond our environments. We can create environments that gives more of the nutrients and protection that we need.

Human Growth. Healthy Transformations. A Flourishing Life Society article image header

We worry. Thinking about the future is an adaptive response to complex problems; we prepare and we avoid. But too much worry interferes with constructive action. We even worry about our worrying.

I Can Change my Brain. A Flourishing Life Society article link

We are either growing or decaying. We don't remain idle.

Happy All the Time. Experiencing a Whole Spectrum of Emotion. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Instead of lying, do what is right. By establishing a habit of openness, we not only build trust but we are motivated to not screw up.

Improving Your Relationship. Changing Damaging Cycles. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Link: Our capitalistic society drives a digging sense that we are not sufficient; we need more. We can grow without the gnawing pain of being incomplete. We fight this with gratitude.

We cannot change without awareness of what needs to be changed. Little deceptions creep in and hide pertinent information.

Imperfect Bonds. Finding Joy through imperfect relationships. A Flourishing Life Society article link

When threatened, the energy flowing through our system demands action. Often we retaliate with bitterness, spewing venom, ruining the things we cherish.

A Flourishing Life Society article link. Legacy of Love

Drawing wisdom from Experience

Love at first sight is a fairy tale. The first look may knock our socks off; But real love takes work.

When life overwhelms and our efforts fall flat, we sometimes learn to not fight, and quietly suffer.

Living a virtuous life is never accomplished in perfection; we integrate ethical standards one small step at a time.

Relationships are complicated and can't be forced. Many fear connection.

Let Go and grow. Damaging Self Narratives. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Limitations of Grit. Determination Mediated by Wisdom. A Flourishing Life Society article link

The instant attachment, finding a soul mate, sounds like a fairy tale; but often is laced with hidden problems. Take it slow.

The Law of Consistency. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Learning from Failure. A Flourishing Life Society article link

link: Life Lessons

Over simplified explanations of life compound our future problems.

Critical Decisions; Making Better Choices. A Flourishing Life Society article image link

We cannot control others; no matter how badly we want to. Some partners will be toxic. The best we can do is identify our own responsibilities.

Past, Present, and Emotion. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Flourishing Life Society Link. Memory: Memories aren't perfect. They form to fit our beliefs, limiting learning and encouraging justifications.

Waiting for Better. The Marshmallow Study. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Our thoughts propel us into fruitful and prepared futures, but they also can haunt our peaceful moments with worry and guilt. By mindful attentiveness to the nature of our thoughts we can gain the benefits and limit the harm.

Protective Interpretations. A Flourishing Life Society article image link

Masters of Living. Successful Living. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Memories and Emotions. How Memories Impact Wellness. A Flourishing Life Society article link

We don't exist in a world of right and wrong choices. There is not a perfect map for us to follow. Most choices include drawbacks and benefits. We must carefully balance our lives, and continually monitor and make adjustments.

Life is complex, not easily described in words. True wisdom comes from accepting the messiness in the unknowable world.

Mindfulness: Space for Unpleasant Emotions. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Link: The Need to Please. The choice between self and others is the basic human dilemma. There is no final answer, finding balance requires constant appraisal and adjustments.

Flourishing Life Society article link. Over Analyzing

FLS Links. Personal Preferences. Dislike without disrespect

A Flourishing Life Society Link. Relationship Anxiety

Mindful examination of the two internal guidance systems behind our action can refine errant predictions and misguided reactions.

Running when the relationship hurts may be more harmful than helpful. We need to carefully consider what is gained before sacrificing a marriage for a flimsy new life.

Flourishing Life Society article Link. Refuse to give up on Love- The hurt of broken love lingers, creating new difficulties and interfering protections. We can overcome these barriers and love again.

Internal Link: The Sole Cause of Our Sorrow

We get hurt, not because others necessarily hate us; but because we have different needs.

We wrongly assess mean actions to soothe our sensitive ego. We must challenge these assessments, examine individual acts, and embrace more kindness.

FLS Link: The Right to Happiness. Living with Joy

Self Worth on Trial. Silencing the Harsh Inner Critic. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Shortcuts to happiness may escape pain; but the temporary relief often has a high cost of long-term trouble.

Life is complex. Rhymes and quotes have limited effectiveness to explain complexities. We need to dig a little deeper.

Questioning Our Thoughts. A Flourishing Life Society article link

A Flourishing Life Society article link. Shared Emotions

Traumatic pasts place strain on the present. If finding love has been painful, we begin to respond defensively with new prospects. We can reprogram and graciously and intimately love.

Wisdom to Know. The Serenity Prayer and Acceptance. A Flourishing Life Society article image link

FLS Link. Ten Signs to leave a person after a few dates.

Changing patterns of interaction is an arduous work. But we can, enjoying deeper more satisfying relationships.

There is a lot of hype on what we should and shouldn't do to be well. The mind and experience are complex. However, our lives improve immensely when we concentrate on a few of the basics.

The consequences of better choices don't immediately change our lives. We must trudge through the beginnings of change, and slowly the improved action accumulates and we receive our reward.

Trauma Hangover. The damaging fears after a bitter relationship. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Drawing wisdom from Experience

Unrecognized Emotions. A Flourishing Life Society article link

Life is complex, not easily described in words. True wisdom comes from accepting the messiness in the unknowable world.

The physical biology of the brain builds memories and habits into the connections that are resistant to change. We, however, can change the firing, abandoning unhealthy patterns for new ways of life.