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Home  |  Flourishing in Life  | Psychology of Wellness | Contact with the Depths

Contact with the Depths

BY: T. Franklin Murphy | April 2018
Harmful Confabulations
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Recognizing Harmful Confabulations
We are delicate. Our psyches feebly interact with the world. As we mature we adapt; not always in healthy ways. Our strength relies on catching glimpses of these adaptations, recognizing faulty confabulations and forging change where needed.
We want certainty. We want security. To allow uncertainty requires fighting the instinctual need to make uncertainty—certain.  In our drive for security, our mind satisfies uncertainty by creatively coloring in the unknowns with incomplete and unsupported explanations. Our mind confabulates non-existing information, explaining causes, and predicting futures. Emerging from our artful make-believe is a smooth, flowing story from the limited known facts.
#growth #mindfulness #pondering #reflection #flourishinglife 
We can’t prevent thoughts from creating meaning; we must make sense of the chaos. We need some graspable framework to act. We can—however— catch glimpses of this fabulous process of the mind, seeing the confabulations at work. When we pause to challenge our stubborn proclamations of knowledge, we discover infinitely more to the story.
"You do not need to know precisely what is happening, or exactly where it is all going. What you need is to recognize the possibilities and challenges offered by the present moment, and to embrace them with courage, faith and hope...." -Thomas Merton
Our bold proclamations are just theories--thoughts without substance. When we understand our thoughts to be only fallible theorizing, we can step back, gain a wider perspective and act without the bothersome interference of unknown biases. From a position of distance, we make better choices pushing forward toward our goals and purposes.
 
Reality is not always the goal for some. Their delicate ego and powerful drives don’t allow for the torture of unknown. They live in a fantasy world, protected by the walls of deception. Sometimes the walls eventually crumble as the surrounding world easily sees the reality of the emperor’s missing clothes. But sometimes, the supporting factors are sufficient to cover the deficiencies. Strengths in other areas, large financial inheritances, or royal lineage interfere with our normal expectations of fairness and the unhealthy of mind achieve undeserved greatness.
Maybe it’s my own defensiveness, or possibly hidden jealousies but I can do without undeserved honors, staying connected to the world the best I can, rooting out disrupting confabulations disguising biases and creating illusions of safety. Occasionally, after completing an emotional essay, I will be struck with the projections, originally missed while in the heat of typing, realizing the exposure of unresolved hurt, and a protective distancing from the pain. These contacts with the depth of the soul are great moments of understanding; maybe only glimpse, which may be easily forgotten, or perhaps when received with wisdom, the contact widens, opens our heart and true growth begins.
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FLS Link. Experiencing Awe: Experiences of awe promote pro-social behavior and invite psychological development. The wise find awe in the awesomeness of life.
Books, conferences and education are wonderful; but deeper wisdom comes from grander sources.
​Positive attitudes boost performance; but if our performance is ill designed we still fail.
FLS link. Namaste: The Hindu origins of the word namaste sparks concerns about state-religion separation. The underlying meaning, however, is unifying.
Greater clarity of self, mindful observance of the happenings in our minds and bodies, improves communication with others. When we adapt to a fast moving world by blocking awareness and skirting around details, we deceive ourselves and fracture relationships.
Our amazing mind assigns meaning to felt experience, creating emotion. Sometimes this process misdiagnosis the environment and leads us astray.
We struggle to objectively evaluate ourselves. We subjectively change the facts to fit our self-supporting reality.
We live blind and deaf to the primary motivating force of action. Feelings unnoticed nudge us to act. We gain a deeper appreciation for life and measured control when we develop our relationship with emotion through focusing.
We cannot change without awareness of what needs to be changed. Little deceptions creep in and hide pertinent information.
Emotions lie beneath the surface, often unnoticed while they covertly hijack our motivation and push action.
FLS Link. Self-forgiveness: Genuine self-forgiveness is a process of accepting responsibility, working through the emotions, repairing damage, and recommitting to values.
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External Links:
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External Link: Meditation Won’t Cure Your Depression, but It Can Be a Big Help
We prepare for unknown challenges by actively engaging in knowledge and skill building activities. We exchange wasteful avoidances and rejuvenate with healthy enjoyments.
Life is difficult enough without the need of a harsh inner critic. Try being kind-- to yourself.
The healthy mind needs more than knowledge. We need spiritual practices that give purpose and meaning, realigning our souls with the greater whole.
There is a small slice of time between emotion and reaction. We need to utilize this space, shove in a wedge, widen the gap, and act with greater wisdom.
FLS link. A Narrative Identity that Heals: We write the story of our life. We create our identity through the narrative that we tell. We must create a narrative that heals our wounded souls.
External Links:
External Link: Life in the time of social distancing: Confined in homes, people battle restlessness, anxiety
External Link: 6 Practical Tips for Everyday Spirituality
External Link: Teen depression is rising fast
External Link: Do You Feel Like You’re In Over Your Head?
We are delicate. Our psyches feebly interact with the world. As we mature we adapt; not always in healthy ways. Our strength relies on catching glimpses of these adaptations, recognizing faulty confabulations and forging change where needed.
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Topics: Mindfulness, Meditation, Emotions
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