Creating a New Life

We can rewrite our story

BY: T. Franklin Murphy | January 14, 2019

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The first steps into a new life are arduous, full of challenge and discouragement. Keep going; it gets easier.

Tomorrow is a new day—a clean slate. A quaint idea, erasing culpability for yesterday. While tomorrow will be weighted with the poor decision of the past, it can be a new beginning. A new day where we can make better choices.

"To live without Hope is to Cease to live."
Fyodor Dostoevsky

We have the Power to Change

We can change the trajectory of our life. We are challenged to accept the present with the marks and bruises from yesterday. We have added wisdom to face tomorrow, more exposure to life. We make choices tomorrow with a little more foundation than the day before. Each day’s actions expand and contract the choices available later.

The present is precious. Yesterday still exists regardless of new commitments. Someone who persistently spends twenty-years planning for retirement has more opportunities at sixty than someone newly begins planning for retirement at age fifty, after squandering resources for several decades.

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We Must Maintain Hope

Don't give up. Don't accept your current lot in life. We must hope there is more out there. We can no longer squander our opportunities. If we have no hope, we have nothing. Life isn't fair, agreed; but we can escape some of the unfairness, bringing more to game than others. We can surmount the challenges.

"Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul - and sings the tunes without the words - and never stops at all."
Emily Dickinson

Changing Trajectories

Changing a trajectory takes work. Life follows the momentum—power not easily redirected. We can’t erase a history of wrongs with a few rights. We will continue to experience residual effects from the past; but as we move forward, change begins. New choices shape the future. New opportunities arise. New habits form. New trajectories take hold and life is new.

See Trajectories for more on this topic

There is a point in the courageous journey of change—the tipping point; the accumulation of new choices eventually out-weighs the past. Changes begin to gain traction and new live emerges from the rubble. Many give up before the tipping point. The fight is too much, slipping back to old routines and familiar consequences.

See Tipping Point for more on this topic

Courage! Patience! Persistence! You can make it, and it’s worth it.

*Article written in loving admiration for my son's courageous fight against heroin addiction and for all those engage in similar battles.

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T. Franklin Murphy

Wellness. Writer. Researcher.
T. Franklin Murphy has a degree in psychology. He is dedicated to the science of wellness. In 2010, he began publishing his findings.

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External Links:

External Link: Two Strange Questions That Might Change How You Live Life

External Link: Opioid relapse is more likely when risks seem OK

External Link: Nice People Don't Finish Last

External Link: It’s better to focus on where you are going than how you are feeling

External Link: Hobbies Can Improve Our Mental Health

External Link: Coping: When Darkness Captivates your Soul: 5 Ways to Release yourself from Depression.

External Link: Five Ways to Stay Motivated On Your Journey to Success

External Link: We shouldn't use alcohol to blot out reality

FLS Link. Fredrickson's Broaden and Build: Positive emotions promote growth by encouraging approach and observation.

Internal Link: Life is difficult- Working through the emotions of living, seizing opportunities, and keeping expectations grounded.

We widen our vision by integrating the fate of circumstances with the empowerment of choice.

A healthy mind integrates values with action. We embrace high-ideals, and then act like an idiot, soothing the dissonance with justifications.

When we expect uninterrupted joy, life intrudes and we feel depressed. Life is beautiful; but not always.

Trying to feel better is a formidable challenge for many. The well-being industry has many theories. Success requires finding proven paths and patiently working towards a better life.

Flourishing Life Society article link. Building Resilience

FLS Link: Change is a four-letter word. We are threatened by the need to adapt; but successful maneuvering through the complex demands of an ever-moving world requires a flexing and adaptable approach. We must change, sacrificing some of our specialness for a happier and better existence.

FLS link. Self-Sabotage: We hurt ourselves. We sabotage healthy endeavors to escape the discomfort of change, settling back into our self-made prisons of stagnation.

FLS Link. Contemplating Change: The contemplation stage of change is more than what we think, it is how we think, expanding our view, dismantling excuses, and building motivations.

We don't magically transform. The process of change is often slow and methodical. Slow down, watch yourselves, and let small choices create major changes.

FLS Link. The Experience Machine: In 1974, Robert Nozick posed a question. Would you plug into an experience machine that provided all the feelings of desired experience without the struggles of reality?