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Deep Reflections

​Contact with the Soul​
BY: T. Franklin Murphy | April 1, 2018 (modified December 30, 2022)

A young lady reflecting. A Flourishing Life Society article on deep reflection
Adobe Stock Images
We want certainty. We want security. We have an instinctual drive to make uncertainty certain. Our mind creatively colors unknowns with graspable explanations. Our mind fills the gaps, explaining causes, and predicting futures. A smooth flowing story emerges from our artful make-believe world. Deep reflection brings some of the hidden world to the surface for examination and refinement.

We can’t prevent thoughts from creating meaning; we must make sense of the chaos to act with any coherency. We need a handle on incoming data to reasonable act in response. Most meaning making occurs beneath conscious awareness. We can, however, catch glimpses of this fabulous process, seeing the confabulations at work. When we pause to examine stubborn proclamations, we may discover our foolishness, and devote energy to understand the rest of the story.

​See Confabulations for more on this topic.
​

​"You do not need to know precisely what is happening, or exactly where it is all going. What you need is to recognize the possibilities and challenges offered by the present moment, and to embrace them with courage, faith and hope...."​ ~Thomas Merton

Thoughts are Just Theories

Our bold proclamations are just theories—thoughts without substance. Accepting thoughts as fallible theories allows us to step back and gain a wider perspective. Only through deeper reflection can we widen our view and navigate bothersome biases. From a position of distance, we make better choices, pushing forward towards goals.

See Widening View for more on this topic

​Protecting the Ego

​​Reality is not always the goal for some. Their delicate ego and powerful drives can't survive the torture of the unknown. They live in a fantasy world, protected by walls of deception. We grasp whatever morsel of proof that supports and ignore the mountains of evidence that refute.

​​Keys to Deep Reflection
​

Deep reflection requires psychological space. When emotions are flowing, space is flooded by the arousal. Pulling our mind away from the momentary trigger is a chore.

Deep reflection is a skill we develop through practice, beginning in calm moments, and eventually working towards deep personal examinations following disturbing arousal.

A few elements to assist with deep reflection:
​
  • First, calm the arousal. Mindful breathing practices often achieve this. (See Mindful Breathing).
  • Second, eliminate judgements. Quietly, reflect on the feeling, the trigger and the reaction. No need to resolve, justify, or condemn. Just a deep reflection.
  • Third, identify personal meaning. What meaning do you give to the trigger? What are possible alternate explanations?
  • Fourth, consider impact. How did your reaction improve or hurt your future? Was hurt caused? Relationships strained? Is there an alternate reaction that could have achieved better results?
​
​Occasionally, less now than at the beginning, comments on an article may arouse my emotions. I get dragged into revolving defensive arguments in my head. But with deeper thought, I'm able to separate from the thoughts, realizing my sensitivity belongs to my own unresolved hurt, and nothing to do with provocative comments. These contacts with the depth are only achieved through deep reflection. Our deeper reflections bring moments of understanding, perhaps, only a glimpse, that may be easily forgotten. Yet, when the practice is habit, we receive a constant infusion of wisdom, our views widen, our hearts open and true growth begins.
T. Franklin Murphy
T. Franklin Murphy
Wellness. Writer. Researcher.
​T. Franklin Murphy has a degree in psychology. He tirelessly researches scientific findings that contribute to wellness. In 2010, he began publishing his findings.
Other Flourishing Life Society articles of interest on this topic:
Flourishing Life Society article link. Building Resilience
FLS link. The Joy of Being. We find joy in living through a more serene path than accumulation and achievement. We find joy in relishing small moments of simply being.
We are pulled into harmful routines by emotion. We feel and then we react. Unfortunately, our reaction isn't always helpful. We need space to think and then act more appropriately.
Achieving the most from the wisdom of emotions requires purposeful effort to integrate emotions into our larger concepts of self.
Internal Link. Self: Here I am. The consciousness of self is complex. We are dynamic beings interacting with ever-changing environments. For stability, we need a concept of self. Too firm a concept and we are limited and deceived, to weak and we have no anchor.
Keeping on trck when life obstacles interfere
Splitting: A Defense Mechanism. A Flourishing Life Society article image link
Reciprocal Determinism. A Flourishing Life Society article link
Putting on My Happy Shirt. Living a Joyful Life. A Flourishing Life Society article link
Flourishing Life Society link to Inner Peace. Creating Inner Peace with Reflection.
Flourishing Life Society article on Focusing. Link to article
We live in an age of prescriptions and corrections. Every oddity is labeled as an illness. We are not ill, just sometimes incompatible. Instead of curing illnesses, we should work towards compatibility.
Our emotions can be great teachers or callous task masters. We need emotion as part of the rich experience of humanness to guide us through the complexities of connection and survival but we must monitor feeling to keep us on task.
A Flourishing Life Society link. Overactive Mind
Picture
Flourishing Life Society article link. Deep Reflection
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