Flourishing Life Society
  • Home
  • Flourishing in Life
    • Addiction Recovery
    • Coronavirus 2020
    • Personal Development
  • Psychology of Wellness
    • Emotion >
      • Emotional Fitness
    • Psychology Archive
  • Flourishing Relationships
  • Health and Fitness
  • About Us

Feeling Felt

Emotional Commuication

BY: T. Franklin Murphy  | November 2015
True communication proceeds from the heart; not the mouth.
Adobe Stock Images
True communication proceeds from the heart; not the mouth. The bonds of love strengthen when we understand what is being felt by our partners.
Communication is essential for healthy relationships; yet often neglected. True communication requires more than rattling off words. Deep communication is a connecting of souls where thoughts and feelings leap from one person to another—a commune between spirits where words often fail.
#empathy #compassion #attunement #intimacy
Many people struggle, missing this lesson in childhood; often because there were no skilled teachers available. The baby is a bundle of feelings first, long before words arrive. Words just facilitate communications of the feelings, often the sounds fail, a weak medium for conveying complex feelings. Sharing emotions is complicated when we barely know what we are feeling—we ache but don’t know why; so, we blindly react, exploding to trivial triggers. Lost in blindness, many relationships express undefined feelings with manipulations, projections and heated words—this is not open communication.

Being Felt

Beyond the words, there must be understanding—understanding of feelings. The feelings felt often get lost in words that vaguely convey an underlying personal experience. We want to be felt. We want to be accepted. We don’t want to emerge victorious from a battle of words. The win is meaningless if we still feel unnoticed and misunderstood

Key Definition:

Emotional Communication: Communication that extends past words integrating the internal experience of both partners. Emotions are recognized, understood and respected.
 A hidden theme beneath most intimate communications is, “Can I count on you?” While unspoken, the search for attachment and acceptance strongly influences human interactions, especially with intimate partners and family. The search for compassionate acceptance gets smashed against the wall of despair when small concerns ignite a heated battle of wills. Instead of a quick response, or defensive reaction, we must reply to the bid for safety, even when the hazy words trying to express a want are unclear. With effort, we can step back and see the distress even when the words don’t match. We should respond to the distress, not the words.

Key Concept:

When partner communication validates our experience, closeness and fondness is fostered.
​Open communication solidifies bonds and builds trust—required for intimacy. The healing salve of connection isn’t won through stinging remarks, and words that pierce the hardened heart of a lover. We build connection through a much deeper communication—in a smile, in a touch, in understanding.  The feeling of being felt heals wounds, opens minds, and creates trust.
Please support FLS with a share:
Twitter Reddit LinkedIn Email

    Flourishing Life Society Wellness Update

Subscribe to Newsletter
*I respect your privacy, email addresses used for newsletter distribution only
FLS Link. Entangled relationships
Relationships, when healthy, provide a connection. We share emotions with respect and support. This vulnerability is the putty from which trust is shaped, formed and hardened.
FLS link: Emotional Intimacy | Creating Space for sharing. A psychological battle of opposing needs requires purposeful effort to meet both safety and belonging needs.
We live blind and deaf to the primary motivating force of action. Feelings unnoticed nudge us to act. We gain a deeper appreciation for life and measured control when we develop our relationship with emotion through focusing.
Relationships are complicated and can't be forced. Many fear connection.
FLS link. Contemplating Compromise: Compromise allows connection and autonomy to co-exist in intimacy.
When we expertly greet our child's emotions with empathy, acceptance and reciprocation, the child develops a positive relationship with their own feelings--a major contribution to healthy living.
Link: Emotional intelligence is the skilled coordination between feelings and logic to guide relationships, action, and healthy development in a person.
External Links:
External Link: What Does It Mean to Be In a Codependent Relationship?
External Link: Will Your Spouse Be a Good Parent? There’s a Test for That
External Link: The dangers of the chemical imbalance theory of depression
External Link: Relight the fire: how to fall back in love with your partner
Intimacy bridges the gap between two people, facilitating exchanges that reach deeper than words could ever express.
True communication proceeds from the heart; not the mouth.
Topics: Emotions, Relationships


Subscribe to Newsletter
Home
  • Relationships​
  • Personal Growth​
  • Wellness
  • Emotions
Proudly powered by Weebly
  • Home
  • Flourishing in Life
    • Addiction Recovery
    • Coronavirus 2020
    • Personal Development
  • Psychology of Wellness
    • Emotion >
      • Emotional Fitness
    • Psychology Archive
  • Flourishing Relationships
  • Health and Fitness
  • About Us