Emotions and Empathy

Emotions and Empathy

BY: T. Franklin Murphy | September 2018

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The feelings of living come to life, pushing experience into a new aliveness. For some feelings are scary and they avoid deep contact with feeling experience. This not only limits their experience but interferes with connection to others.

Being in touch with the budding feelings of personal experience is essential before we can empathically relate to the feelings of someone else. If our own feelings are unacceptable, shunned and buried, we will also recoil at others’ pain. Any emotion threatens those afraid to feel.

Intimacy, closeness and security are constructed from the frightening vulnerability of emotion. But through empathy, we connect through shared experience. The thick walls of indifference begin to tumble. Suddenly, the selfish and cold experience of pretend logic loses its appeal for the warmth of aliveness. We must feel to empathize and connect.

If you suffer from this malady frightened by feeling, there are adaptive practices to introduce you to the rich world of feeling. Emotions don’t have to remain hidden in the greys and blacks of a protected world. We can change, opening our hearts to the colors we have missed. Our fears may prevent a quick dive into an unknown world.

We begin with gentle exposures, mindfully dipping in one foot at a time. Experiencing forgotten pains, and basking in present joys. As we allow quietness to weave its way through our psyche, gently touching on the feelings, without word or commentary, we open to the magical world of feeling. Inch by inch we discover a new aliveness—a world we overlooked, lost between the words. We first discover ourselves and then are ripe to discover others.

When we expertly greet our child's emotions with empathy, acceptance and reciprocation, the child develops a positive relationship with their own feelings--a major contribution to healthy living.

A wave of pop psychology, suggesting happiness is paramount,often neglects the importance of others. We can improve the feeling states. But science is clear, rich and fulfilling lives include healthy connections with others.

True communication proceeds from the heart; not the mouth.

External Links:

External Link: https://www.wsj.com/articles/the-surprising-science-behind-friendship-11581256802?fbclid=IwAR2K5PsculwOAQqWNtABEh-Ei4eBGFrDFSne6CmOmWAHT7pJb8vpZxefXpg

External Link: The 4-Step Tool I Use to Deal With Uncomfortable Emotions

External Link: Compassion: the Romantic (& Sexy) Element Missing in our Lives.

FLS Link. Emotions and Empathy. The feelings of living come to life, pushing experience into a new aliveness. For some feelings are scary and they avoid deep contact with feeling experience. This not only limits their experience but interferes with connection to others.

Topics: Emotions, Relationships, Empathy

Emotions and Empathy

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