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Home  | Personal Development  | Frightened by Weakness

Frightened by Weakness

Perfectionism and Authenticity

BY: T. Franklin Murphy | April 2018 (October 10, 2021)
A young woman with a frightened expression. An article on perfectionism.
Adobe Stock Images
We fear rejection from exposing imperfections. We tip toe through life with a false sense of self, frightened of authenticity. 
We march across the same bridge a thousand times never fearing its integrity, until we peer underneath and see the rust and cracks. Now that same bridge feels different. Each sway sparks fear of collapse. We hold the rails a little tighter, move across with more urgency. We fear our demise. Our security in our mental, and physical strength is like the old rusting bridge. We enjoy confidence until the weaknesses are exposed.

Experience, failures and self-examinations are necessary for growth. They reveal our underbellies to consciousness. But these same processes also strike fear as faulty protective images when self-work is determined necessary.
"The day the child realizes that all adults are imperfect, he becomes an adolescent; the day he forgives them, he becomes an adult; the day he forgives himself, he becomes wise."
​Alden Nowlan
A prerequisite of growth is self-knowledge. With clearer vision, we gain insights into personal stumblings. Reality stuns, when we discover that much of our discontent may be our own stupid fault.  Like Oedipus, “we moan put out my eyes to avoid seeing.” The courageous journey into the heart isn’t pleasant; but is necessary to transcend the behaviors preventing opportunities and dulling happiness.
Our journeys unveil newness. With compassion, we can process imperfection. Instead of retreading worn out protective blindness, we can seek healthier answers to adapt to lives difficulties. Fantasy, denial and projection can warp into healthy suppressions of dangerous and destructive impulses promoting healthier coping mechanisms.

​We can’t take life head on all the time. Sometimes during our development, the emotions can overwhelm. We can revert to healthy avenues to shelter and protect. Relationships, exercise and challenging hobbies are excellent choices to redirect energy, calm the nerves, and rejuvenate the spirit for the next round of life.
 
Once rejuvenated, we can grab our tools, slip under the bridge and began the work of scraping away rust and replacing compromised and broken pieces. Only with healthy adaptive ways of facing our limitations can we engage in the maturing process of growth, building character, skill, and resolve to make it across the inevitable challenges of living.
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T. Franklin Murphy
T. Franklin Murphy
Wellness. Writer. Researcher.
​T. Franklin Murphy has a degree in psychology. He tirelessly researches scientific findings that contribute to wellness. In 2010, he began publishing his findings.

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External Links:
External Link: How My Constant Perfectionism Takes Over My Life
mindful link banner. Article on self-kindness
External Link: 11 ways we can practice self-kindness
External Link: Practicing Self-Kindness
External Link: Why Thinking Small Is Your Best Defense in Tough Situations

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Inner Strength. Psychological and Emotional Capital. A Flourishing Life Society article link
Building Blocks of Choice. A Flourishing Life Society article image link
A Flourishing Life Society article link. Cognitive Dissonance
Banner link: Punishing Imperfection-  Critical self-judgments create an unfriendly environment for growth. Under harsh conditions the self-begins to conceal reality to protect the soul.
Internal Link Banner for catastrophizing.
Stressed Out. A Flourishing Life Society article link
We unwittingly promote unhealthy defense mechanisms on line. There are plenty pf social media participants willing to support life limiting adaptations.
A Flourishing Life Society article link. Gentleness
A Flourishing Life Society Article Image link. Accumulating Troubles
Flourishing Life Society article link. Know Thyself
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Flourishing Life Society Link: Facing Ineptness
Science cannot answer all the details of life, much remains undiscovered beyond the grasp of laboratories and imaging machines. This is the undefined center of life.
A Flourishing Life Society article link. Gestalt Prayer
Flourishing Life Society link. Adaptation Psychology. Effective Adapting to Life
A Flourishing Life Society article image link. The Lure of Sameness
Frightened by Weakness. A Flourishing Life Society article link
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