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Home | Personal Development | Life's Journey

Life's Journey

Purpose and Pleasure

BY: T. Franklin Murphy | July 14, 2020
Vista overlooking beautiful beach. An article on Life's Journey
Trinidad, California
We travel through life, sometimes towards meaningful destinations, other times aimlessly wandering. We need both purpose and pleasure on our life's journey.
Life’s a journey—beginning in the womb, ending in the grave. This metaphorical explanation of life is rife with allegorical wisdom, providing structure to organize the chaos of experience.

​This week my wife and I took a short walk up a prominent peak in northern California, overlooking the Trinidad fishing pier and state beach. The main trail was well-marked and maintained, climbing quickly to the top. We worked our way through the arduous climb, routinely diverging from the main trail, following small paths that led to incredible vistas. We lazily explored each path, soaking in the beauty, basking in the awe, and then returning to the primary trail, eventually arriving at the planned destination.
"However, due to our fear, resistance, stress, and obsession with being right, we often end up being inflexible to our own detriment and frustration of those around us." 
Mike Robbins
Life is difficult—more than a leisurely walk. However, challenging climbs and beautiful vistas accompany our travels as we awkwardly move forward with purpose.

​People approach life differently. There’s no perfect allotment of structure and flexibility. We bounce between chaos and structure, openness and protectedness. Many tackle life with intensity. Goal driven. Success oriented. They have the get-to-the-destination attitude.

​The exclusive focus on the destination allows little time for rejuvenating digressions. Hard-driving individuals power to the top without diddle-daddling along the way.
There’s no perfect allotment of structure and flexibility.
Others live on the edge of chaos. They have little motivation to arrive at a distant destination. They aimlessly wander. Structure free explorations is pleasure focused, providing momentary escapes, and surprise discoveries.
 
In between free-for-all chaos and unbending structure, we find flexibility. While we easily see the theoretical faults of overly structured or complete chaos, we fail to recognize our individual proclivities of chaotic wandering or rigid rule following. Objectivity is a beast. We get lost in rosy colored subjectivity.

​The best mixture is fluid; not only different between individuals but varying in need according to context. Well-meaning encouragement for flexibility is dangerous when directed at an audience of chaotic explorers. However, change the audience to rigid, goal-driven robots and the advice to pause, breath and enjoy the sunset is more than appropriate.
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Like most self-development advice, we are challenged to evaluate our style and need. We must identify protective explanations that excuse comfortable habits. The red flag is waved when we defensively argue that our balance is perfect—it is not. Perfection is seldom achieved and never maintained. We need to either expand our perspectives by widening our exposure or limit diversions by focusing on the goal.
"By definition, being flexible means being able to bend without breaking. In our relationships, that is certainly true; if we don’t 'bend' a little, something will break, usually the relationship."
Diana Lynne

 
Somewhere in the fabulous journey, we find psychological wellness—a healthy dose of pleasure and achievement. Many activities integrate both pleasure and purpose; we find enjoyment in meaningful pursuits. We must, however, engage in some work that isn’t pleasant. Some sections of our journey quickly ascend, challenging muscles and endurance.

In these trying moments, we must periodically escape with pleasurable excursions to pick a few flowers and enjoy breathtaking views. The simple diversions provide rest to our weary legs and rejuvenate our tired souls, preparing our minds and bodies for the remainder of the climb.  ​​
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T. Franklin Murphy
T. Franklin Murphy
Wellness. Writer. Researcher.
​T. Franklin Murphy has a degree in psychology. He tirelessly researches scientific findings that contribute to wellness. In 2010, he began publishing his findings.

Index:

Flourishing in Life
  • Personal Development
  • Mindfulness
  • Addiction Recovery
  • Wellness 
Psychology of Wellness
  • Emotions​
  • Personality
  • Defense Mechanisms
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About Flourishing Life
Psychology Definitions Data Base Link
Flourishing Life Society Link. Emotional Fitness
Wellness Links:
External Link. Hope is the antidote to helplessness. Here’s how to cultivate it
External Link. Albert Camus on why accepting absurdity is the start of a fruitful life
External Link. Do Better with Dan. Accepting Death as a Part of Life
External Link. Psychology Today. Why Do We Love Underdog Stories?
External Link. Young Minds. Mental Health Help
External Link. The Guardian. The rise of emotional spending

​Other Flourishing Life Society articles of interest on this topic:

Flourishing Life Society article link. Nine Pillars of well-being
Books, conferences and education are wonderful; but deeper wisdom comes from grander sources.
Emotions are primary motivators for action. Sometimes misguided action needs to be inspected for appropriateness.
Mental Health Benefits of Nature. A Flourishing Life Society article link
Living is serious business, give yourself a break. Harsh judgments hurt the soul and slow progress.
FLS Link. Realistic Optimism: Optimism brings energy to action, motivating persistence in the face of difficulty. Our wellness benefits most from optimism when it is based in reality.
Flourishing Life Society article link. Over Analyzing
We widen our vision by integrating the fate of circumstances with the empowerment of choice.
FLS Link. Experiencing Awe: Experiences of awe promote pro-social behavior and invite psychological development. The wise find awe in the awesomeness of life.
FLS Link. The Experience Machine: In 1974, Robert Nozick posed a question. Would you plug into an experience machine that provided all the feelings of desired experience without the struggles of reality?
We are engaged in a constant work of becoming, satisfying needs, entertaining wants, and creating meaning. We can do this purposely or haphazardly.
We get stuck in an existential funk, searching for meaning. Life may not readily appear meaningful; but we can give life meaning.
FLS internal Link. Life's Journey: Structure and Chaos.
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