Painfully Close a Door
BY: T. Franklin Murphy | September 2018
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With grit, we can work ourselves through some problems, other problems persist, and others we need to abandon, close a door and wait for new opportunities to arrive.
Life meanders through the flat planes of existence in unpredictable ways; sometimes desires are thwarted, other times unexpected opportunities arrive. I occasionally hear the almost patronizing retort to disappointment, “It’ll all work out in the end.” When I hear this, it feels like being chastised for sorrow over legitimate troubles.
#love #relationships #divorce #startingover Often difficulties straighten out on their own; life tends to be survivable. Life has wandered on this planet for millions of years, no matter what their disappointments. But sometimes problems are significant in the present, right now where we experience them. Maybe a decade or generation down the road my pain may be meaningless, and from the wider angle it just didn’t matter. But it matters now, to me. Many obstacles straighten out simply because we purposely work through them. Sometimes we should abandon the problem and move on. Not all problems can be solved or abandoned, the serious kind, those problems linger. The “working out part” may be more of a collapse, challenging every fiber of our being. I can’t proclaim that a drug addicted child suffering a violent death is what I would define as a problem “working out.” Bad things happen, defying meaning and explanation and we must learn how to cope and move forward. Maybe a decade or generation down the road my pain may be meaningless, and from the wider angle it just didn’t matter. But it matters now, to me. Effort, courage, and grit may push us over the stubborn crest to achievement, solving the unsolvable. These noble qualities of actions are often in short supply; however, sometimes, we must utilize a different approach, moving forward sometimes includes taking a few steps back, shutting one door and trying something different.
Shutting doors is not simple. Downright frightening. New doors of opportunity are often obscured; only to appear once we willingly move away from the past, and fumble around in the dark. And then Bam! It hits us, there it is, the golden opportunity. However, abandoning ship too quickly leads to sorrows, always second guessing our direction, and dreaming whether or not we should quit. “What if I stayed,” we ask. Unfortunately, those questions can never be answered. Great achievements bless those who persist; not those who quickly tire. Usually, improving current situations is better than trying something new; but not always. We must occasionally painfully close a door, struggle in the dark, and then victoriously discover new light we never knew existed.
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