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Home  |  Flourishing in Life  | Psychology of Wellness  | Past, Present, and Emotions

 PAST, PRESENT, AND EMOTIONS

BY: T. Franklin Murphy | January 2013
Traumatic Pasts can fog our present, invading our peace with strong emotions that interfere with connection and goodness.
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Traumatic pasts incite strong emotions in the present, spoiling opportunities for recovery.
We are moldable—molded by the past to react to the present. Our adaptation to experience has great survival implications. We learn. Emotions intricately woven through out the body are programmed from the pains and joys of the past. Similarities in the present draw upon these memories and we feel pain, sorrow, excitement, and anger. There is utility in emotion; there’s also irrationality. We sometimes act against our best interest. Slipping through, impacting our learning, we integrate chaos.
#emotions #trauma #healing #flourishinglife
The clandestine ties between the present and past ignites emotions. If we believe an event, person or place threatens security, acceptance, or survival, we react; the heart beats stronger, blood pressure rises and muscles tighten. If, conversely, we believe the event, person or place secures a need, we also respond. Biologically we are emotionally connected to experience. Life occurs in much more than just the firing of neurons in our head.
"There is utility in emotion; there’s also irrationality."
Our emotional reactions intricately guide us towards people, things and activities that appear nourishing and repel us from people, things and activities that appear destructive. The reactions have evolutionary value, not just for survival but also for flourishing.
 
Biological characteristics pass from generation to generation, not because they are flawless, but because of a survival value. The possessors of the trait survive better than those lacking. This attraction-repelling guide is an imperfect system. Its programming (learning) is susceptible to viruses that distort emotional reactions. We may be attracted to the dangerous or repelled by the healthy. Depending on the clarity of experience, we build predictable or chaotic emotions. Th associations we build through experiential learning aren’t perfectly aligned with reality.

An angry word from our partner doesn’t necessarily threaten the stability of the relationship; but our emotions may respond as if it does. A slight disagreement with a coworker doesn’t diminish personal worth; but we may respond as if it does. Our emotions jump to radical conclusions, demand answers, and ignite wars.


A turbulent childhood of impoverished emotional support and unpredictable punishments creates an emotional glass house, signaling danger for every small pebble. As adults raised in chaos, we can combat the internalized mess through rigid structure, attempting to eliminate the anxiety of the unknown. But perfect structure fails, the broken soul suffers when the delicate balance is rattled from the slightest daily disruption.
 
If our pasts included physical and emotional violence, we adaptively recoil at any possibility of danger—no matter how miniscule the event. We adapt, avoiding similar situations where pain was administered. No matter what the nature of our childhood—healthy or not, we have emotional triggers. A mundane event may trigger unbearable streams of emotions. Once emotional centers are triggered, we succumb to a cascade of biological changes, chemicals release into the blood stream to prepare for battle.
Understanding the biological processes of emotions and building awareness to the triggers provides a road map for living, guiding us through circumstances we find threatening. Once we identify beliefs that trigger emotions, we can examine and challenge the beliefs; a slow process that eventually diffuses power behind emotions disrupting our lives. As we become familiar with reactions, we engage self-soothing early in the process before an all-out emotional explosion. By doing this, we avoid damaging consequences of an irrational response. The skills to combat flaws in this imperfect system must be developed through patient practice.

We are human—our biological systems occasionally overreact. It’s the way we function. While our system will never be perfect, they serve us well. With a little fine tuning and patience, we can enjoy the waves of the sea as they crash on our shores and then recede without having our emotional house knocked off the foundation and busted into ruins.
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FLS link. Posttraumatic Growth: Significant traumatizing events destroy our stable view of the world. From these ashes, growth is possible. We get back up, re-examine our world, adjust our expectations and move forward, a little wiser and stronger. We grow in response to the trauma.
FLS Link. Self-forgiveness: Genuine self-forgiveness is a process of accepting responsibility, working through the emotions, repairing damage, and recommitting to values.
Our amazing mind assigns meaning to felt experience, creating emotion. Sometimes this process misdiagnosis the environment and leads us astray.
Emotions can suck us into destructive cycles.
Emotions flow in patterns. Through awareness we can identify patterns and make necessary changes to live a better life.
Emotions can be powerful--so powerful we may avoid them and the people expressing them. Empathy is gained through openness to experience, one on one contact with the feeling experience of others.
we process life in multiple realms. twon notable realms are felt experience and logical computations. Neither is better than the other. Both are needed to succeed.
Life is felt. If we fear the emotions of living we will be unable to connect with others.

External Links:
External Link: Feeling like you’re to blame for the mistakes of others? Personalizing is the problem
External Link: What anxiety does to our breathing
External Link: Which of These Four Attachment Styles Is Yours?
We live blind and deaf to the primary motivating force of action. Feelings unnoticed nudge us to act. We gain a deeper appreciation for life and measured control when we develop our relationship with emotion through focusing.
We making choices daily for our health,security, and connections. Life constantly beckons us to act. Often one action may serve one need while neglecting or damaging another need. We must find balance, somewhere in the golden middle.
When we expect uninterrupted joy, life intrudes and we feel depressed. Life is beautiful; but not always.
Wellness on the Web
External Link: Never Not Broken. Falling Apart and Coming Back Together
External Link:  Giving Yourself Permission
External Link: Consciousness Isn’t Self-Centered
External Link: Navigating Difficult Emotions
Our emotions are programmed by the past, they arrive in the present, interrupting happiness. We can adapt and adjust through awareness.
Topics: Emotions, Psychology, Motivations


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