Quirky Personality

Accepting the oddness
BY: T. Franklin Murphy | June 21, 2021 (modified January 5, 2023)

A quirky looking girl with coke bottle glasses and a big nose.

Adobe Stock Images

We need the security and confidence to express our quirky personality traits. Go ahead let yourself loose.

Okay, so I am a bit quirky. I say and do odd things. Even my wife looks at me, rolls her eyes, and silently questions my mental stability. Perhaps, although she would never outwardly admit it, those very quirks are what she finds appealing.

It's a monstrous paradox. Our oddities highlight our wonderful individuality while igniting the pesky insecurities of being different. The awkward moment of silence following our propensity to say something stupid stirs anxiety as we wait for signs of either acceptance or rejection.

Boldly Stepping Beyond Socially Accepted Behavior

Many social rules must be followed. Wear your pants to the store. Don't pick your nose (in public). Other social rules imprison personalities, making us stuffy and unrecognizable from the crowd—break those rules. Let your quirkiness escape.

Like they say, "those that matter don't mind; and those that mind don't matter." When we skip across unexpected boundaries, some undoubtedly will reject. A little too much excitement for their imprisoned conformist souls.

A Quote on Quirky Personalities:
"The descriptor “quirky” is similar to a diminutive nickname: it carries affection and a trace of scorn—a kind of effortful, warm-hearted condescension." ~Katy Waldman

Worrying About Acceptance

Hey, I worry about acceptance. I'm shy for a reason. Perhaps, shyness is a defense mechanism protecting my otherwise quirky personality traits. Worrying about others reactions to ill-timed gestures is an adaptive trait. We humans survive better in groups.

However, put me among friends, people that accept and the quirks escape in full force (a few beers also contributes to the emancipation of suppressed goofiness).

Expressing Quirkiness and Wellness

Over suppression is draining. Marching to the generally accepted norms is a strain. We painfully realize we aren't normal. We need routine freedoms to be our odd selves. We can't experience radical self-acceptance if we always keep that self bound and hidden. Part of the solution is courage to let loose. The other part is discovering environments where our quirkiness is perfectly acceptable. A place where we can just be ourselves, enjoy the security of stupidity, and not be harshly judged.

Flourishing is more than a tight collar and pressed pants. Wellness includes the ability to lean back and relax in confidence, knowing we are lovely in all our stupid quirkiness.