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Strong Urges

Strong Urges

Biological Pushes to Act

BY: T. Franklin Murphy | April 2018
An image of an equalizer reaching capacity. A Flourishing Life Society article about strong urges
Adobe Stock Images
The Urges that Destroy
We get beastly urges pushing for harmful action. Listening to these desires that hurt destroys our lives.
Shoving us one direction or another, internal impulses can’t be ignored. Sometimes chemically stimulated from addiction, other times programmed from experience, the underlying forces lie in wait to explode and direct choice. We unwittingly find ourselves in the chains of desire. The raging wants obscure freedom, distracting from healthy intentions with a maddening drive to act.

​Desires aren’t evil. Many desires are survival oriented, pushing to expand life, enjoyment and growth. Other desires are not so majestic, morphing healthy intentions from chaotic and disjointed experiences. Our minds, try as they may, can’t organize the mess into an enlightening whole. We force the broken pieces into jigsaw interpretations, ignoring the reality of the missing and misfitted connections.

"Human decision-making is complex. On our own, our tendency to yield to short-term temptations, and even to addictions, may be too strong for our rational, long-term planning."
​Peter Singer

Starting the Change

Somehow, perhaps by hitting the bottom, or a disastrous encounter, we realize something is wrong. Life is failing to conform to our childhood dreams. A careful examination may expose faulty desires that push for destructive action that serves no future purpose. Change is necessary. Acknowledging is simple; acting a challenge. Trying to emerge victor over bastardly desires that continually haunt our efforts is a mammoth undertaking. We must act different than our bodies tell us we should. We must look into the throat of the beast, see the fangs, and then act differently.
"The most important thing is that we are on the right path, and we will not deviate from it, even in the face of strong temptation to choose temporary gains over long-term benefits."
Yemi Osinbajo

The moment of choice becomes our new rallying point. We must refrain from escapes routinely employed, hold words previously spewed, continue forward where we use to rest. The tiring work of change is often exchanged for the more pleasing work of justification, finding easy targets to blame, chemicals that dull feelings, and others who support our debauchery.
 
The paradise of a fulfilling life lies beyond the hurt of misguided desires. We must end our slavery—the blind obedience to emotions; and begin a new course of living. A course that harnesses desires for our good, creating richness and connection to the surrounding world.
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T. Franklin Murphy
T. Franklin Murphy
Wellness. Writer. Researcher.
​T. Franklin Murphy has a degree in psychology. He is dedicated to the science of wellness. In 2010, he began publishing his findings.

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Banner link to Flourishing Life Society's Psychology articles
Emotional Regulation archive. A Flourishing Life Society database
Emotions article archive. A Flourishing Life Society Database
Flourishing Life Society Link to articles from 2010-to 2015
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External Links:
External Link: Navigating Difficult Emotions
External Link: Treating anxiety without medication
External Link: How to Calm Down When You’re Feeling Extra Anxious
External Link: You can’t completely trust your memories
External Link: Meditation Didn't Work For My OCD & Anxiety -- But This Practice Did
External Link: What Happened to My Mood When I Started Painting Once a Day
Flourishing Life Society Link: Emotional Intelligence
Flourishing Life Society Link. Article: Three Emotional Regulation Techniques
Picture Link: Venturing into the Unknown-- Carefully moving forward in a complex world.
Flourishing Life Society Link. Emotional Guidance System.
Frustration tolerance is our ability to withstand frustrations and continue moving towards goals. A Flourishing Life Society article link.
Picture
A Flourishing Life Society article link. Interpreting Feeling
We worry. Thinking about the future is an adaptive response to complex problems; we prepare and we avoid. But too much worry interferes with constructive action. We even worry about our worrying.
We live blind and deaf to the primary motivating force of action. Feelings unnoticed nudge us to act. We gain a deeper appreciation for life and measured control when we develop our relationship with emotion through focusing.
Feelings are not a fool proof method for decisions. Our biased reliance on our own intuition can lead us astray, especially when we rely on our thoughts over proven and compelling research.
We are pulled into harmful routines by emotion. We feel and then we react. Unfortunately, our reaction isn't always helpful. We need space to think and then act more appropriately.
FLS Link. The Fleeting Emotions. When emotionally flooded, it is difficult to cognitively inject thoughts to escape the moment. We need habitual practices that we automatically integrate into these moments that calm the system first, then we can cognitively join adapt, thinking of the future.
We get beastly urges pushing for harmful action. Listening to these desires that hurt destroys our lives.


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