Thought and Influence

Tempering Selfish Impulses
BY: T. Franklin Murphy | May 1, 2018 (modified January 24, 2023)

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​With conscious thought we evaluate futures and temper impulsive directions. We honor the gift of consciousness by considering our impact on others.

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The human ability to plan, ponder, evaluate, and communicate empowers deliberate change. These skills set us apart from most other living animals. We can intentionally focus on elements affecting our lives, examine for appropriateness and effect purposeful change. Consistent growth depends on a healthy environment to provide protection and nutrients. If we stagnate, disappointed in our life, we must skeptically examine our environment. And begin the process of change.

"Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another."  ~Napoleon Hill


Our Thoughts, Communication, and Influence​

The mind creates heaven and hell—not just for ourselves. Our plans also significantly impact others. The mind, with its extensive systems, generates actions that extend beyond the boundaries of the body. With a word, a glance or a sneer we intrude on the emotions of others. Our feelings are not entirely our own. External people ignite feelings in us; and we ignite feelings in others.

​The minds connect, influencing the brain, and our bodies. Often these sacred powers of influence are misused to manipulate. Many carelessly force change on partners, ignoring the partner’s rights, joys and desires. The narcissists capitalize on these connections. But we all utilize this power.


Power of Influence and Responsibility

With the power of influence comes great responsibility. Influential power should be used with great restraint. Our behaviors, words, and emotions influence surrounding environments that nurture or harm those sharing space. Many haphazardly manipulate, cajole and exploit others into serving their selfish purposes with careless concern for the impact.


"Blessed is the influence of one true, loving human soul on another."  ~George Eliot


Impulses to manipulate others to serve selfish needs should be tempered with compassion, kindness and respect. If our desires, wants and needs come at a great cost to others, we should re-examine this path to our goal fulfillment.

By mindfully observing our behaviors, acknowledging our attempts to manipulate, we can then adjust. Unused empathy and compassion deteriorate. We narrow our views and close our minds. Our relentless drive for success dulls the value of essential social bonds. Unless we carefully watch ourselves, we drift from intimacy, losing our soul in the sea of selfishness.